Would you have sex on a first date? This is an age old question that many have pondered on. Recently, I saw some debate about this online, some people for and others against. There are people who believed doing so means you’re loose as a girl (it’s always about the girl by the way, no one ever says the boy who had sex on a first date is loose but I digress ) and a few men who said it doesn’t matter. A guy who will leave you will still leave whether you put out on day 1 or day 40!

My own take is it depends on what you see as a first date. Before you go out on a date with someone you probably have been talking with the person over the phone for a while so you already know what vibes you both were giving off. We almost always know when we go out with someone which encounter will lead to you giving up the goods and which won’t. Let me explain what I mean.

I met this guy a few years back at an event and we exchanged numbers and got talking over the phone after. Right off the bat, I knew where it was going. We both knew. The whole conversation was just so sexualized and we knew that’s what our meet up was going to be about.  When we did fix to meet up barely a week after meeting, I knew what I was going there to do. (Lol). To me, that wasn’t a first date in a traditional sense, I went there to put out, point blank period!


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At the talking stage of a relationship, you know a guy that’s serious and the one that isn’t so you know what the focus of your first date will be. The key is to be sure you’re not pressurized. Don’t think, “Oh, he gave me a very good first date, I feel like I have to reward him with sex.” That’s not right. Men, don’t also expect with every good date, it’s incomplete if it doesn’t end in the bedroom. That shouldn’t be the point unless both of you agreed.

I’ve seen people who had sex on their first date that are married and people who didn’t that aren’t. It all depends on who is involved and how compatible you both are. A very closeted girl can have an amazing first date that ends up with sex, that doesn’t make her loose. Let’s stop making that a topic of conversation.

As for me and the guy I hooked up with barely a week after on first meeting, that story is juicy but it’s for another day.

Till then, put out or don’t put out, whoever is for you is for you. Toodles!v