What would make a man cheat? This is a question more than half the population of women would want an answer to. The number of cheating spouses and partners seems to be on the rise and more and more women are accepting it as a norm in their relationships. Some women as a way of consoling themselves would say cheating didn’t start today.
Yes, it didn’t start today as a matter of fact, but we can all agree it has become more socially accepted today. There have been cases where women will caution other women about ‘making noise’ about a cheating spouse.
“Is he not taking care of you and the children? Why will you allow a small thing like cheating destroy your home?”
If one may ask, what are the factors responsible for this behaviour and why has it been on the rise? Some people would argue that the number hasn’t risen but that more people are talking about it, thereby bringing it to the front burner. Others would unequivocally argue that there are more women willing to make themselves available hence the rise.
As for the men, their reasons range from not being ‘satisfied’ with one woman to availability of other choices.
Femi Ademola, Business man
“They can never get enough and if they do get enough they wonder if there isn’t more. Also, there’s always a girl willing to step out with you even if there’s evidence of you being tied down.”
There are some men who would argue that cheating is not really cheating but just the nature of a man.
Olumide Alabi, Lecturer
“Men are polygamous by nature. Since the advent of our traditional and religious echelons, take it from Abraham, traditionally, ask your grandfather how many wives he got married to.The cheating philosophy is an old colonial mindset advanced by the West to curb our culture as Africans.”
Godson Seun, Lawyer
“As a guy we are sexually attracted to anything that is female. Some guys just can’t control it. It’s just how men are wired.”
Then there are the responses that don’t give a clue to a specific reason why.
Ed Strak, Civil Servant
“Why do mean cheat. To be honest, I don’t think there is a single answer to this. I think most times it’s because of one factor or borne out of different factors such as:
1. We want out of the relationship.
2. We think it makes us a man.
3. We don’t realize what we’ve got. Jay Z’s case comes to mind. Who cheats on Beyoncé?
4. It could also be linked to low self-esteem.
5. It’s also an addiction.”
Ladi Elton, Contractor
“The reason men cheat is very broad. In my own opinion, guys naturally love sex. Most men objectify women and see them as sex tools. They are just attracted to girls and feel the need to follow through and then brag about it to friends in beer bars to aggrandize themselves or what not. Some also give the excuse that it’s biological and have the delusion that it’s a man’s world and you can do anything you want. That’s why a man will be living in the house with his wife and he will go downstairs to touch the house girl or even the wife’s sister.
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It’s also the selfish part of men, commitment is just crazy and too much of a responsibility. So we become selfish and say ‘I have a big heart for all my ladies, why should one girl keep me when there are lots of them out there that need this thing?”
It’s just something we do. Immaturity also comes in; when one lacks experience in being in committed relationships. I’ve asked a friend before, ‘You say you love this girl why are you still dating? Why can’t you just stay for six months, one year without straying? Just test yourself if you can chill.’ There’s also a lot of trust issues in relationships, girls too can mess up. Right now I think the tables have turned and women cheat more than men now and that brings in insecurity and lots of shit in guys’ heads.
We are more emotional, that’s why if a girl breaks our heart, it’s crazy. Girls are stronger and forgive easily, we can’t forgive like that. We then go around using this heartbreak as an excuse to be jumping from one girl to another. Not to forget my own flaw, alcohol can make you do things. Too much and you’re going through your phone looking for who is easy bait even if its 1a.m. Sometimes I get lucky, most times I don’t. It’s really crazy.”
Femi Lawrence, Architect
“Why do men cheat? Because variety is the spice of life.”
Ben Stephen, Electrician
“Men cheat because we don’t know what we want and we are never satisfied.”
Dave Umana, Medical Doctor
“Simply because they got up and planned to cheat. There’s no justifiable reason to cheat. It’s simply because you as an individual thought about it and you went along to do it.”
John Okocha, Enterpreneur
“There’s this saying that ‘All men are cheats’. It may not be 100% true but trust me a lot of times it is true. It’s in the nature of man to cheat. It may sound somehow and some men will hear it and get outraged saying it’s a lie. But it’s true. It’s in the very nature. Even the most religious pastors have been caught or rumours of them cheating fly around. Even in the bible men cheated. Anything that has to do with man and woman, I’ll tell you it’s inherent for them to stray. I’m not saying all men have had sex with another woman while with a partner but it’s hard to find a man in two or three that hasn’t cheated or that won’t cheat.
Men cheat for too many reasons; getting carried away can make a man cheat. Just looking at a woman can make a man cheat. If he’s in a relationship and cheating, sometimes he’s not fulfilled with what he’s getting maybe sex, her character, her looks, there could be a lot of deeper reasons sometimes. Other times, there could be no reason at all, some guys just love to explore. Even with the most beautiful girl in the world a man could still look for another woman and you will wonder what he’s seeking for.
Men can also cheat based on what goes on in his relationship. Even a faithful guy can cheat for this reason. Some guys also get talked into it by friends. Men just like to cheat, it’s like getting visa from US to Jamaica just like that. That’s a man’s world. It’s fun for them not serious at times. Some will do it and still respect their partners.”
Victoria Jima, Fashion Designer
“They cheat because once they see a babe, they imagine sex with her and they end up going for it.”
